Before trudging off to bed last night, i came across this message from Dr. Ali Walker:

“Know Where You End and Someone Else Begins.”

And I reposted it to my facebook page because, well, it’s total and complete TRUTH!


We are human beings but we are also energetic beings, and we can take on energy and emotions from other people. In fact, we DO take on the energy and emotions of others, and we do take on thoughts and belief systems from others as well.

As an empath, I know this to be true. Not only do I feel it and experience it daily, I also see it unfold and occur around me in everyday living situations.
The thing is though, you don’t have to be an ’empath’ or even have an awareness of this happening for it to happen…it just happens. We attract and disperse energy fields ALL the time! That is the way of our being here on planet earth. And in doing so, we take on stuff from other people and other places. We absorb what’s going on around us, and we rocket out what we are experiencing, creating an entanglement of energy between ourselves and those who contribute to our lives.

This entanglement of energy is one that I feel can be best observed through the very regular and normal practice of sleeping with partners; no, I’m talking sex……yet ?……but rather the act of falling asleep next to someone.

For me personally, the whole entanglement of energy became obvious a few years back when I became acutely aware of feeling like I needed to put a barrier up between my husband and I when we were in bed together……sleeping ?

In that situation, I could feel his energy ALL the time! I could feel it pulling me, at me and on me ALL the time. Even when he was sound asleep, snoring his cute little head off, I could feel the pull of his energy on mine; wanting, seeking, engaging and actively trying to participate and engage with mine.

To me, it felt like even in that moment, even in our moments of rest, I wasn’t free or separated enough to relax into my own being for restoration and self nourishment as I slept, and that’s when I knew that I had to actively become responsible for managing my own energy and what I was or wasn’t taking on from others, even when I was sleeping. In essence, it was ensuring that I knew where I ended and where he began.


Sleeping or not sleeping with a partner, isn’t an easy hill to navigate, especially with someone who has a deeply ingrained belief that if it’s not all touchy feely when we sleep, all stations are required to be set to the ‘Houston, we have a problem’ frequency. 

But here’s the thing, if you are not sleeping well with your partner (which, by the way, is no reflection on the degree you love one another), if you are waking up sluggish, if you are aware of having your energy pulled, if your unsettled in your sleep, then it’s worth exploring the possibility that the energy of you and your partner are actively trying to consistently participate and engage with each others, even in those moments of sleep.

If this is occurring for you, if you are finding that your energy isn’t your own when you are sleeping, the good news is, you can do something about it! And the even better news is, that you deserve to do something about it!!

So, what can you do?

My first step to managing my energy in bed, was to be aware of it and then consciously push, send or return the energy away from me and back to him. I would then, through my thoughts and energy, place an energetic barrier between us so that his energy wouldn’t creep on over to me, and so that mine didn’t creep on over to his.

If you can do this, you can manage to stay in the same bed together, YAY!


If it’s not as effective as you’d like it to be though, guess what? You can choose to not sleep in the same bed ?! Simple!!
Have those intimate moments; make love, have sex, do whatever; and then go off to another bed, another room…another house if you want to ? !

My point is, there is absolutely NOTHING in the life and relationship rule book that say’s we have to sleep in the same bed as a partner, lover, husband or wife. NOTHING! It’s simply a case of that’s what we’ve been taught, ingrained with, grown up seeing thus, believing in.

So, if you are one of those people who deep down know that you and your energetic health and well-being would be much better served sleeping on your own, then start the conversation. Come up with ways to make sure that you are both feeling connected and satisfied, but take the leap and support your health and well-being a little bit more by sleeping on your own.

Choose the words and the language that are supportive for all concerned, and begin to know where you end and someone else begins.


With Love & Blessings,
Gemma Rose Green

P.S. And just in case you were wondering…….YES! I sleep in my own bed with a child or two in tow while my husband is off in another room all together, and I feel so much BETTER for it ?!

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Author: Gemma Rose Green is a Psychic Intuitive Holistic Healer, focusing on the mind, body, soul and spirit, & a Badass Life Coach, with a passion for family & generational healing. She is also an Author, Writer, Creator & Witch, dedicated to inspiring a healing revolution from within, promoting self & generational healing, through the power of voice & communication, accountability & acceptance.